impulsively starting a blog

wow. i've found that writing this is a way more harder task than i originally thought. i want to let loose and pour out my thoughts here, so i will try to do it softly - one step at a time, so bear with me.

i'm here because i want to sort out my thoughts properly. and yeah, you might ask (if there's even anyone reading this through some wicked sense of fate), 'hey why don't you journal like a fucking normal being?'. well! i do journal in my free time, i'm trying to kind of get into it and journal even more, but this one night something just got into my head. why don't i start a blog? it might be because i've started feeling alone, or because i just want something new, or just because i need at least one single person to read my thoughts, and maybe not even say anything about it, just... be there to hear them. or, well, read them. you got the idea.

i'm not here to give life advice, i think i'll try to make that as clear as it can be. i'm not here with a planned blog already - no, not really. i'm here to figure shit out, and i think that's going to take a whole lot of patience and bearing with me through it. i think it's going to take a lot of time, too, but i think it will be a good (yet big) step in my life, because right now i'm at a point where i have been 'warned' repeatedly, let's put it like that. 

i'm in my early 20s... do you know what that does to one's mind?

frankly, i'm losing my fucking mind and i feel like i don't have anything figured out. so maybe a blog will help somehow. in my mind it makes sense. 

so hey, bear with me through figuring shit out in my 20s so far, and if someone out there is reading this (doubting because it's the first post, but well, you never know), then please, please, please, bear with me through all of this if you're interested to hear about how life takes unfortunate turns and how change is constant. oh, yeah, and please bear with me because i've got no guts to either make a youtube channel, nor make a podcast.

so... i'm stuck with writing. but i'm content. i'd never be able to express my thoughts otherwise.